He Put My Stapler Inside a Jelly Again

• Classic ones are probably "Free Love on the Gratuitous Love Freeway" and David's dancing. Oh, that dancing... shudder.
• From the very starting time episode: "He's put my stapler inside a jelly again!"
• Keith, on the differences between British and American English:

  Keith: Give-and-take of alarm then, out there they call them "fanny packs"...
  [pause]
  Keith: Crusade fanny means your arse over there...
  [extremely long pause]
  Keith: ... non your minge.
  [takes a bite of a scotch egg]

• Keith's performance review is pretty funny also...

  David: Under "strengths", you've written "Accounting"... and under 'weaknesses' you've put 'eczema'.

• Absolutely annihilation in the "Training" episode, "I Call back In that location'S BEEN A RAPE Upward THERE!"
  • And Gareth is taking notes.
  • Discussing the idea of ultimate fantasies, the trainer says he'd like an island, David waffles about time travel, and Gareth declares "Two lesbians, sisters - I'chiliad only watching." Following an awkward silence, Tim declares he'd like to hear more from Gareth, for once. And you can come across a very small grinning on Gareth's face.
• The Series Two episode where Gareth puts a very sexual phone call on speakerphone accidentally. Made even funnier by Tim'southward absolutely flabbergasted face up.
• Gareth's rambling virtually the imaginary sniper on the roof across from David's senile dad's retirement dwelling house.
• If you don't know me past know...
• David explaining how hard it would be to try to be funny when he just got fired. He even shows his (probably expensive) "chicken rider" outfit, and fifty-fifty though your heart breaks you can't help but to suffocate from laughing.
• Tim gluing Gareth's phone for a express joy. And then Gareth prying the phone open to answer it.
• For us literary nerds, there's this line: "Tim Canterbury...The Canterbury Tales. By Chaucer. And Shakespeare." Coupled with the fact that it took Ricky Gervais and Martin Freeman over 25 takes to film that scene because they kept corking up.
• Later on a particularly tragic night out at Chasers, Gareth is seen riding home in the sidecar with a couple for some Three-Way Sex activity. His confront as he passes the camera is a thing of dazzler.
• David Brent telling Jennifer what a brilliant person Finchy is, then putting him on speakerphone and having to backpedal on what he'd but said. And Finchy jokingly says "stop looking up her brim" as Davids eyes begin to wander.
• Gareth's cringe-worthy attempt at courting Rachel even though she's seeing Tim. He then compromises with:

  "If yous do become all the fashion with Tim and yous desire me to go in (points at her crotch) there straight afterward, make sure he wears a condom. It's sort of a dominion."

  • Quesioning what Rachel sees in Tim, Gareth declars his colleague looks "like a little Fisher-Price man".
• David'southward attempts to endear himself to the Swindon co-operative by telling every bit many jokes as he can. The deafening silence he gets allows for Tim to permit out a very audible "ooh..."
  • He later tries to overcompensate by telling a joke about a black homo's cock. Then a black employee turns upwardly and David goes quiet. Jennifer finds out though and reprimands David.
  • David then jokes well-nigh how Jennifer needs to mellow out, peradventure with some "wacky-backy". He's immediately brought back in for another scolding.
• Gareth playing with his "Dirty Bertie" toy. He finds it hilarious, but Tim finds it annoying. So when Tim's recommending Gareth for the manager's position, y'all can hear Gareth playing with Bertie some more. The guy'southward his own worst enemy.
• David going on a blind date. He says that the woman he's looking for is wearing a white scarf. When he glances backside him and sees an obese, middle-aged woman wearing a white scarf, he mutters "Oh, for fuck'south sake". Followed by him telling her, "I've got a blind date, and I idea it was yous."
• And his phone-telephone call to another woman, where he tells her that he was in a documentary chosen "The Office".

  "God, you're not that atrocious dominate, are you?"

• Anne non just describing to Tim but demonstrating how she angled herself so as to get her husband's penis deep inside her enough to conceive. Tim just stares into space, wishing it would end.
  • The Anne-Tim non-human relationship generally, with her epic self-absorption.

    Anne: I went to a lot of places over the years, and the number of infatuations blokes take had over me, oh God. I mean they know they tin't have me, only it don't end 'em. I dunno what information technology is well-nigh me they similar so much.

    Tim: Yeah...I've been racking my brains.

  • At that place is as well the delightful moment when Anne finally gets put in her place past Glyn (the warehouse foreman) afterward hectoring him nearly smoking virtually her at the role party. Lookout man Tim trying difficult not to laugh:

    Glyn: You retrieve nosotros care as much virtually your infant equally you do? Just cos you let some useless tosser accident his beans upward your muff? Well done! Merry fuckin' Christmas!

• One post-credits shot shows that Tim's screen-saver is scrolling text that says "Gareth is a Benny".
• After Gareth becomes manager, Tim nicks the keys to his part and locks him in. The kicker? This isn't the beginning time he'due south done it.
• David going on a engagement-night. Dressed every bit Austin Powers. Guess how well that goes.
• David showing Donna how to use email by demonstrating on an employee'due south computer. He opens up a message and Donna cracks up laughing. It'southward then revealed that the message was a pornographic picture with David's face up in information technology. When David demands to know who has seen this, anybody raises their easily. Including the cleaning lady - who doesn't even take electronic mail.
• "You're non all going to lose your jobs. Expect, (To ane employee) y'all're not going to lose your job, (To some other employee) you're not going to lose your job, (To another employee) you know, uh... (Moving on to the adjacent employee, leaving the previous one in tears) you're non going to lose your job..."
• When the female person employees are talking about what kinds of men they discover attractive, Shy auditor Sheila says "I similar blacks", with Oliver (the part black-guy) sitting right adjacent to her. He suddenly looks rather nervous.
• When David is hired to be a motivational speaker. He comes in dressed like a homie, acts extremely flamboyant without offering any substantial advice and runs out of the room with "Only the Best" by Tina Turner playing him out. Watching him pose for photos is pretty funny besides.
• When Neil and Rachel are performing a Saturday Dark Fever-style dance for charity, David's reaction is "That looks gay".
• Neil bakes a birthday cake for one of the part women and David is overheard sniping: "I prefer a flan!"
• Gareth and Tim's discussion well-nigh whether Tim's position (Senior Sales Rep) outranks Gareth's (Squad Leader):

  Tim: Information technology's a title someone has given y'all to become you lot to do something they don't desire to do for gratuitous. It's similar making the div kid at schoolhouse milk monitor. No ane respects information technology.

  Gareth: Er yes they practice, because if people were rude to me, and so I used to give them their milk concluding, when it was warm.

• David and Gareth's conversation with Alex (the soon to exist fired forklift driver) about the differences between dwarfs, midgets and elves. Alex storms out, then the guy repairing Brent'southward computer chimes in:

  Then what's a goblin?

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Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/TheOfficeUK